My Light in the Darkness
by Obasan-Neko
Summary: It may sound funny, but falling for him was the worst thing that happened to me back then. Years later hating him brought me the love of my life and gave my two kids the best father I could ask for. Funny how things happen.
1. The Past, Present, and Maybe the Future

Its come to my attention after re-reading this story once again, there are a few flaws in my story line. Ive decided once again, to rewrite chapters 1-4 since I just recently wrote chapter 5. I hope you, my lovely and loyal reviewers, will enjoy the rewrites as they come up. Also, I have decided to change the names of the twins, lately I just feel like they are just to much alike, and honestly it confuses me to write them.

Neko

_Journal Entry  
'thoughts'  
_"Talking"

_At 21 I have to wonder why my mom suddenly decided to buy me a journal. It's been nearly five and a half years since Inuyasha left me alone and pregnant at sixteen. Kenji and Yumi are my life now and no matter how much I hate Inuyasha for never returning my calls or my letters, I cant help not regretting the gifts that came from that one fateful night. I guess this journal was a good idea for me, I feel a lot better after writing some of my thoughts down. The rest will have to be told at another time, for my mother invited her co-worker Sakura and her two sons over for dinner. From what my mother told me, the oldest is a full inu demon and that he is blind, and the youngest is a half inu demon, which very much reminds me of Inuyasha. _

I pulled myself out of my thought upon hearing my mother knock on my door. I bid her enterance and she walked in.

"Dear, Sakura and her sons will be here in a few minutes, would you like help getting Kenji and Yumi ready?"

I smiled at her, she really was the best mother anyone could ask for. Even though she had Sota to take care of, she always helped me with my twins.

"No, thats okay mom, I can get them ready." I said standing up from my desk. "It will only take a few minutes. They arent one anymore."

My mother just looked at me and laughed softly. She knew I was refering to when they starting walking, how they would alway pull clothing out of the laundry basket and try to pull them on.

"I'll go make sure Sota is ready then and I'll see you down stairs in a few mintues."

I nodded at her and watched her walk out of my room. I walked out of my room and over to the twins room. I looked inside and saw they were already dressed. I guess when they saw their outfits on the bed they wanted to dress themselves. I walked into the room and looked at them both, checking on their clothes to make sure everything was buttoned correctly.

"Very good, both of you, you buttoned everything right." I beamed at them, smiling and tickling them softly. I really was proud of them, they were growing up so fast.

"Mommy, are you gonna wear that for dinner?" Yumi asked me pulling at my sweat pants.

"Of course not Yumi." I said walking out of their room. "Would you and Kenji like to help mommy choose what to wear?"

As I expected they both perked up quickly and flew by me into my bedroom. I just shook my head and walked into my room. When I walked in Yumi and Kenji were in my closet looking through my clothing. I decided to wait and see what they would pick out for me.

"Mommy, green dress?" Kenji asked me, pulling the botton of a forest green dress that I hadnt wore yet.

"I think thats perfect Kenji. Yumi would you like to pick what shoes Ill be wearing?" As soon as I asked, she pulled out a pair of my silver flats.

"Now, while mommy changes, will you two go see if gram needs any help?"

They nodded and ran out of my bedroom. Now to get changed. The dress they picked was a lovely forest green that reached a bit past the middle of my thighs. I quickly slipped it on and grabbed my grey leggings. I slid them on and then slipped on my flats. I glanced in the mirror, now how do I do my hair? Seeing how I didnt have much time I looked at my hair falling just past my shoulders. I parted my hair slightly to the right before pulling half of up into a clip. My bangs fell covering my forehead. I wanted simple yet elegant. I grabbed my silver eyeliner putting on a thin layer and then doing the same with my forest green eye shadow. I finally looked at myself in my full size mirror. I looked good for someone with two kids.

I made my way down stairs and past the living room where I found Kenji and Yumi playing with one of their video games. I guess thier uncle Sota is rubbing off on them. I walked into the kitchen and looked for my mom. She was checking on the food in the oven. I heard the doorbell ring and I was about to walk over to the door when my mothers voice stopped me.

"Kagome, honey, I need you to do me a favor."

I just looked at her and nodded.

"Can you go upstairs and grab my sweater, I'm a bit chilly." Once again I nodded and headed up to her bedroom. Upon my landing on the last step I heard voices.

"Yumi, Kenji, please stop running around the living room, our guests have arrived."

"Sorry." Was all I heard as I walked into my moms room. I should have known what was coming when I came back down stairs but I didnt.

"Excuse me Ms. H, who are the little kids? My mom said you had two kids." One of the boys asked

I heard my mom hesitate to answer the boys seemingly harmless question.

"You'll have to ask my daughter young man. Now, Inuyasha, its been a few years since I saw you." I heard my mom say that name and I froze midway down the stairs.

_'Inuyasha? As in Inuyasha Takashi? How could my mother invite them here? Oh my, Sesshomaru, he's blind? How could that be?'_

I finished my desent down the stairs and handed my mom her sweater. I looked at our 'guests'. Inuyasha hadnt noticed me yet, he was staring at his kids, not that he knows they are his. Sesshomaru, who had gotten taller and whose beautiful golden orbs had vanished, was holding onto Sakuras wrist. Sakura looked at me and then spoke.

"You must be Kagome." The moment she spoke my name, Inuyasha's head flew to me.

His jaw dropped. He knew my mom, did he really forget about me while he was in America?

"Kagome?" He genuninely sounded surprised

I looked at him and just remained emotionless. Then I turned to my mother.

"You invited HIM?" I asked in french

"I didnt know who her boys were until they walked in, there isnt anything I can do Kagome." She replied in french

Sakura looked at us frowning, it wasnt proper manners to speak in front of your guests in a different language. She never really liked me before they moved and blamed me for Inuyasha failing his classes in grade 10.

"I'm sorry for Kagome, she doesnt speak much Japanese anymore." My mom said to her

Sakura nodded her acceptance and let it go. I had a feeling something was going to happen. I walked into the living room and sat down on the couch. I looked at Kenji and Yumi and tried to figure out what I was gonna do about this situation.

"You know, having your mom lie for you isnt very good." A males voice said to me in french. I looked up and it was Sesshomaru, holding the door frame.

"I'm sorry, if she believes I dont speak Japanese, maybe she wont speak to me and neither will your brother for that matter." I said to him

He had a weird look on his face, like he was trying to figure something out. He moved a white cane in front of him and slowly walked into the living room. I was about to stand when he found the edge of the couch. He felt for someone sitting and when he found no one he sat down. Our conversation after continued in french, even after his mom walked in.

"Why dont you like Inuyasha?" He asked me softly

"He hurt me." Was all I said

He, once again, had that look of confusion.

"You're kids, are they his?"

My jaw dropped. I swear if it was possible my jaw might have hit the floor.

"Why would you ask that?"

"They dont smell like him, but what other reason could you have to hate him so much?"

I stayed quiet for a few mintues and as I was about to speak Sakura walked in.

"You speak japanese, dont you?" She asked me, giving me a hard look. I just gave her a weird look, pretending I didnt understand what she was saying.

"I'm not buying into your speaking only french little girl. You're hiding something." She said accusing me of hiding something, if only she knew the real truth.

I looked over at Sesshomaru, he had a look of anger on his face. I reached over and grabbed his hand gently. He looked at me or tried to look at me. And then I spoke to him.

"Kenji and Yumi are your neice and nephew. I tried so hard to get a hold of him before they were born, but I never could. Then when they were born, I tried sending letters with pictures of them. They always came back unopened. Eventually, I just stopping trying altogether. I've raised them alone, with the help of my mother, since they were born. They have no idea he is their father, and I really want to keep it that way."

Sesshomaru nodded and smirked.

"Kagome asks why you are giving her such a dirty look and wonders why you cant just ask me what ever you want to know so I can repeat it to her in a language she will actually understand." He asked his step mom glaring at her. I had to hide my smile, or it would give my secret away.

"I'm sorry Sesshomaru, I refuse to cater to a child who refuses to speak the same language as everyone else. She grew up here, how does she not speak Japanese?"

I looked over in Kagomes direction before speaking to her. I didnt ask her the question Sakura asked but another one I wanted to know.

"Is his name on their birth certificate?"

"No, its not. Tell her my father was french."

I looked in the direction I heard Sakuras voive come from. I really didnt like her, I've never liked her. She was to snotty and wretched.

"Her father was French, so she spent a lot of her childhood in France."

I had to resist the urge to smirk at this whole situation. Here I am, sitting with the mother of my neice and nephew like we've been friends for years. Meanwhile, helping her lie to my step mom about not being able to speak Japanese, and on top of it all, I couldnt even see what she looked like.

_'What a day this is turning out to be.'_

End of the newly rewritten chapter 1. Its exactly 7 pages, so woot for that. I changed a lot of things that happened. I like it better this way. And I hope everyone understood how I switched to Sesshomaru's point of view towards the end. Im testing not putting in a written change of a character's point of view like I usually do, see how well it works. Let me know your thoughts.

Neko


	2. Bringing in the big man Inutashio

I hope my rewrite is better than the orignal. The reason Im changing many things is because I dont like how they were going. Some of it will stay the same, just written much better than it was when I first wrote it. As for the french, I wanted a language besides english that I could use, even if I wasnt using the actual french words, to have Kagome be able to speak to Sesshomaru without Sakura being able to understand. It's more so Sesshomaru and Kagome can get to know each better. So off to the story.

_'It was interesting to me that Sesshomaru went along with my plan so easily. I barely knew him when I was seeing Inuyasha a few years ago.' _

I glanced at Sakura who was still standing in the middle of our livingroom. She wasn't happy, that much I could tell just by looking at her. I knew this was only the beginning of her anger with me.

"Just because she spent some of her childhood there doesn't mean she shouldn't be able to speak Japanese anymore. I mean, after all, her father has been dead for nearly 8 years now." Sakura said, staring me down.

_I will admit that was a hurtful thing for her to say, but I wasn't going to let her get the best of me. _

"That was a horrible thing for her to say to you. I never thought she would bring the death of your father into a conversation just because she is angry. I am very sorry, Kagome." Sesshomaru said to me, looking at the ground.

He was pretending to feel bad about translating what she had said. Only he and I knew the truth, we weren't really talking about what she was saying, we were talking about each other.

"I dont apperciate you talking about my husband in such a crude manner." I heard my mum say. "The last thing you will do in my home is make my daughter feel bad about her speaking french just because you don't like it."

I smiled softly, nudging my hand against Sesshomaru's. He was smirking at hearing his stepmother be snapped at.

"I'm sorry, you're right, I shouldn't have said that to her." Sakura said to my mother in a falsely sweet voice, but I knew it was fake.

I looked at my mother, after Sakura looked away. I tilted my head towards the door, silently asking her I could take a short walk before dinner as I always did. She nodded, not that I didnt expect her to. I leaned over closer to Sesshomaru to whisper in his ear.

"I'm taking a short walk outside, its something my father and I used to do when I was a child. I'll be back shortly, if you'd like to come outside at any point, just ask Kenji or Yumi. They will be more then happy to help you Sesshomaru."

After I was finishing talking to him I stood up and walked past Sakura, giving her a false smile and a nod before I walked out the door.

_'I didn't care that I left the house without speaking to Inuyasha or his mother. I didn't want to speak to him. I wanted to punch him, to hurt him the way he hurt me. I didn't care anymore, but I wanted him to know how much he hurt me.'_

"Kagome! Kagome! Wait up!" I turned around quickly seeing Inuyasha jogging up to me

I looked at him, but I didn't to speak to him. I just turned around to contiunue my walk. I was enjoying myself, pretending he wasn't there until I felt him grab my arm. He yanked me around to face him, his eyes glaring at me. He obvisiously was angry that I wouldn't speak to him.

"Why are you doing this?" He asked me. "Why are you acting like I did something to you?"

I gasped softly, my eyes tearing up, but I refused to cry in front of him. I didn't want to speak to him, but I knew I had to, even if its only once.

"Why am I doing this? Why am I acting like you did something to me?" I asked him softly. "You left me Inuyasha. You left and you promised that when you left, you would call me, write me, anything to keep us together. I was stupid to believe you."

He just stared at me, saying nothing. Not that I had expected him, we havent spoken since he left.

"I tried for months to contact you, I sent you letters and I called you everyday. You're mother told me about Kikyo, your new girlfriend in the states. I didn't believe her at first and then I talked to Sango. You didn't know she was there, did you?" I pulled away from him after that. "Sango wouldn't lie to me."

"I still love you Kagome, I was only seeing her because she reminded me of you." _Lies._ "Please forgive me." _I can't._

I just shook my head at him and started walking back towards my house.

"Its all lies Inuyasha, and I can't forgive you walking out on my when I needed you most."

"You couldn't have tried that hard. My mother never told me you called Kagome, I thought you didn't want me anymore." I turned toward as he finished that statement, l couldn't tell if he was lying or not. "Whose kids are they Kagome? You're so mad at me for cheating on you when here you cheated on me and had some guys kids."

"Those children are none of your concern Inuyasha!" I snapped at him.

"So you're a common whore then? You dont know who their father is do you Kagome?" _That comment stung. A common whore, that was the last thing I was going to let him call me._

"I am not some common whore who doesn't know who the father of her children is. I know who their father is and he does know about them." I spat out at him, lying.

"Whose are they then Kagome? What demon did you shack up with to have two half demon kids?" He asked me staring down at me. I had lied so far, but who I do I say is their father now.

"They are mine Inuyasha."

We both looked behind Inuysaha. There stood Sesshomaru, holding Kenji's hand. My poor son, he looked so confused. I walked over to him, taking his hand from Sesshomaru's. I whispered in his ear.

"Baby, I need you to go inside. Thank you for escorting Sesshomaru out here. Ask Gramma to give you and Yumi some juice, okay." He smiled widely, his one front tooth missing, before running back into the house.

I looked at Sesshomaru before speaking his name.

"Sesshomaru?" I asked, still holding his hand.

He pulled me closer to him, holding my waist softly.

"He doesn't need to know they are his. They don't smell like him and judging their description of them from Kenji, they can pass as my own."

I just stood there, mouth agap. I shook my head softly.

"I can't let you do that Sesshomaru." I whispered in his ear. "They aren't your responsibility."

"Then will you tell him the truth? That they are his?" He asked me softly. "I'll claim them as my own, no matter what you tell him Kagome. He doesn't deserve you or them. I'll show you I'm a better choice to be their father, even with my blindness, then ever will be."

"You slept with my brother?" Inuyasha all but screamed at me. "My own brother?"

I couldn't do this. I suppose he has a right to know that they are his. I just can't bear the thought of telling Kenji and Yumi Inuyasha is their father and having him break their hearts if he leaves.

"I'm going to adopt them, brother of mine." Sesshomaru said before I went to speak.

"Then who is their father then?" Inuyasha asked me again. I pulled away from Sesshomaru and walked up to Inuysha.

"You are you idiot." I told him shoving him in the chest. "Why do you think I tried so hard to get a hold of you, why I sent so many letters, why I despertely needed you. After you left I found out I was pregnant."

He just stared at me like I was crazy, but he didn't say anything. He just gaped at me like a fish.

"Are you going to say something little brother?" Sesshomaru asked him. I walked back to Sesshomaru and grabbed his arm.

"It doesn't matter what he says, he maybe their biological parent, but he will never be their father." I said quietly, but loud enough for Inuyasha to hear.

I lightly grabbed Sesshomaru's walking him back to the house. Neither of us said a word to each on the two minute walk back home. It wasn't until we got into the house that we spoke again.

"I meant what I said outside Kagome. I would adopt them, if you let me. They never need to know he is their father. They would pass for my own." Speaking in French all the time was difficult, since I naturally spoke Japanese, but this was the only way I could ensure that Sakura could butt into our conversation.

I sat Sesshomaru on the couch and sat next to him. I didn't know what to say to him. He wanted to take care of my children, his niece and nephew, as his own. It wasn't something I could ask of him. Nor was it something I expected him to do.

"Yumi and Kenji are my responsibilty, not yours Sesshomaru. I can't let you do that."

"You can let me do this. I know that Inuyasha hurt you and I know you're afraid to let someone in your heart again. I want to be there for them. There is something in my heart telling me this is the right decision."

He was right. After Inuyasha left, I never dated anyone again. Even after I had the twins, I never put myself out there. Who would have wanted a girlfriend that at sixteen had not one but two newborns. My life was and still focused on my children.

"Mother, I need to speak with you. Right now." I heard Inuyasha say to his mother.

"When did he come in? I didn't even hear him." I asked Sesshomaru quietly

"I'm not sure, he must have just come in. We didn;t notice because we were talking." Sesshomaru told me, holding my hand. "I think he is over the shock of having two kids and is about to tell Sakura."

I gasped softly. This was definitely not how I wanted this night to go down. Not at all.

"WHAT! Inuyahsa what do you mean those two kids are yours? Thats impossible." I heard her yell from the kitchen.

This was going to be a long night. I could just see it now. I was waiting for her to come flying into the livingroom, screaming her head off at me. Less than a minute after I thought this did she do just that.

"You girl!" She yelled pointing at me. "How dare you tell my son that those children are his. You are only saying that because his has money."

I didn't react to that. It was an insult I know, but I wasn't about to let her get to me. Instead I looked at her and laughed. Sesshomaru still had ahold of my hand and was squeezing it softly.

"What is wrong with you? You're just a thief going after men for their money." Yet again I laughed and then I glared at her. Finally I was going to speak to her and it wasn't going to be pleasant.

"Mother, take Yumi and Kenji upstairs." This was the last thing I spoke in French. I stood up and let go of Sesshomaru's hand. I walked up close to Sakura, just inches from her face. I looked her in the eyes and spoke in Japanese. "Listen and listen well Sakura. I will never allow you to call me such vulgar names. How dare you insult me by saying I'm only telling Inuyasha they are his just for his money. That's such a sad thought. I don't need his money, I have my own. Those children are his. You never asked me why is was so important that I speak to Inuyasha after you moved. For months I tried to get a hold of him to tell him, but you refused to allow me to speak to him. I sent letters with pictures and I got back unopened."

I didnt yell, scream, or even raise my voice. I just spoke calmly to her. She wasn't going to win this battle.

"You're lying. My Inuyasha would never have been so careless. I raised him better than that. You were always the reason he did bad in school. Once we moved his grades got better, almost perfect you would say. Now to ruin his life, its like I never rid him of you. Your like a disease Kagome, you spawn lies and weave your way into the hearts of men only to drop them when you get what you want."

I just stared at her. What the hell is she talking about?

"I do no such thing. Where do you get this information from?"

"Inuyasha told me you dumped him because we moved. He asked me to make sure you couldn't get a hold of him. I did just that. Any letters were sent back. I was doing what my baby asked me to do. To protect him from you."

"I never broke up with him. He promised to make us work even when he was in the states. I loved that boy with everything I had, until I found out he was cheating on me with some American girl he met."

"Kikyo, I remember telling you about her when you called once. She's his fiancee now. He proposed over Thanksgiving." He lied to me.

"Sakura, this is enough. I've called Father to come here. This is a matter to be talked about by the heads of the family. I've told him of my plan to adopt Kenji and Yumi." Sesshomaru spoke from the couch.

Sakura looked like she was about to explode.

"You called Inutashio to come here? This is none of his concern, I can take care of this. Those children will never be part of this family Sesshomaru."

"You maybe be his wife Sakura, but you will never be my mother. You know as well as I do, father will side with me, no matter what you say. I'm his heir, his first born, his only full demon son. I will make my decisions just like I have since you married my father."

"I am more your mother than your own mother was. How can you be so ungrateful?" Sakura exclaimed. It was then that the door slammed shut and there stood Inutashio.

He looked just like he did when I met him. I was fourteen at the time. It was a year after my father had passed away. He looked scary to me the first time we met, but I loved his silver hair. I told him just that and from then on, he acted like he was my other father, never tried to replace my father. Just to be a father figure in my life. I stared at him for a minute. He looked a tad bit older than I remember, but his long silver hair was just like I remember it. Pulled up in a high pony tail. I was the first to speak.

"Your wife hates me." I said bluntly, walking up to him. "You can see for yourself, my children Kenji and Yumi, are one hundred percent Inuyasha's. I would never lie about something so serious. She said I was only telling Inuyasha they were his for his money."

"Inutashio, she is lying!" She exclaimed

Inutashio looked at me and then his wife. Shaking his head and wrapping his arms around me he spoke.

"You dishonor me, my wife. To say such horrible and rude things to Kagome, is insulting to myself." He said hugging me softly. "There is a car waiting for you outside. Leave and go home. I will speak to Kagome and Inuyasha about this alone."

"Inutashio, what about Sesshomaru. What about his plans to adopt those two children?" She asked him, trying to stay in the house.

"I will deal with everything after you are gone. As I have already said before, you dishonor me and Kagome. You are no longer wanted here. You and I will talk about this later. You better remember this is not the end of this conversation."

"Inuyasha is just as much my son as he is yours. I have the right to be considered in anything decided."

"You may be his mother, but I am the leader of this household. Now leave, before I have one of my men escort you out."

I watched her leave, still standing in Inutashios embrace. This night was just beginning.

Whooohooo two chapters in one day. Hopefully tomorrow I can have chapters 3 and 4 written for you lovely readers. I hope you all like the rewrite, I know I do. I don't have a beta, so I apologize for any grammar errors and the like. Just let me know if you see any. If did not say it, I hold no rights to any Inuyasha characters. That belongs to Rumiko Takashi. I only own any orginal characters; Yumi, Kenji, and Sakura. Thanks for reading.

Neko


	3. The discussion

I am hoping everyone who read the new chapters found them to their liking. I really do think it is so much better now. So, I hope everyone likes it and continues to read and enjoy it.

Once again, I do not own Inuyasha or any of its characters. I only own any original characters.

* * *

Once I heard the door close I pulled away from InuTaisho. I walked back to the couch and sat next to Sesshoumaru once more. My mother finally came back downstairs.

"They are playing a game with Sota." She said. "I think we should move this discussion to after dinner, if that is alright with you InuTaisho."

"I think having dinner first is a lovely idea. I'm rather hungry myself, and if what I smell is correct, you made curry." He said laughing

"Yes, I know how much you loved my curry, so let's go eat."

I grasped Sesshoumaru's hand and smiled softly. This was going to be a long discussion after dinner.

We ate peacefully, only after InuTaisho yelled at Inuyasha to shut up right as he went to say something. I sat next to Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha across from me, shooting me occasional dirty looks. I didn't let him bother me. He could think whatever he wants to, I know the truth. After dinner, Sesshoumaru and InuTaisho thanked my mom for dinner, whom blushed and said her thanks.

Once again, I held onto Sesshoumaru's hand and directed him into the living room. We sat on our love seat, InuTaisho taking the chair, and my mom and Inuyasha taking the couch. Then I waited for the discussion to begin.

"Inuyasha, I know those children are yours. The fact remains, do you deserve to be called their father?" InuTaisho asked him from his seat

"Yes, if they are mine, I want to be their father."

I squeezed Sesshoumaru's hand when Inuyasha finished. I wondered if that was really what he thought. Just because he is their biological father, doesn't make him their dad.

"InuTaisho, I don't feel that Inuyasha is up to the responsibility of taking care of one child, let alone two." My mother said to him softly

"I understand how you feel, as I feel the same." InuTaisho spoke to her and then looked at me. "How do you feel about this Kagome? What do you want to happen?"

I didn't pause before I spoke my reply.

"His name is not on their birth certificate. If this situation had not occurred, he would have never known they were his children. If it's possible, I would prefer if Inuyasha had nothing to do with them at all. They have no idea who he is and I want it to stay that way." I spoke to everyone in the room. "Doubled with the fact I was told Inuyasha was getting married, I most certainly refuse my children to be anywhere near his future wife. I've heard many things about her from my friends in America, and I do not want my children to be opened to her kind."

"There is nothing wrong with my future wife, Kagome. She is absolutely wonderful, and would without a doubt make a better mother to those children." Inuyasha spat at me

InuTaisho lashed out at Inuyasha before he closed his mouth.

"Watch your mouth pup!" InuTaisho snapped. "There will be no talk of Kikyo in the rest of this discussion. There is a car waiting outside to take you home if one more insult seeps from that disgusting mouth of yours."

Inuyasha went to say something and then stopped. He finally just nodded and hung his head down.

"Now, I have no doubt you have done an excellent job with the children, and I will never say any different. My next question is to my other son, why do you want to adopt them?"

"Father, if I may, I would like to discuss that with you personally."

I looked at Sesshoumaru and then InuTaisho.

"You could have that conversation in the kitchen if you would like to."

InuTaisho nodded and stood up. I nudged Sesshoumaru who also stood up. I walked with Sesshoumaru into the kitchen and then went back into the living room. The three of us sat silently until they returned.

After Kagome left me in the kitchen with my father, I sat down for a moment to regain my composure.

"I've always felt, since I met Kagome, she was much better suited for myself than Inuyasha. Even after five years, I still feel this way. I used to think it was because I thought she was beautiful, or because I thought Inuyasha wasn't good enough. In this case, I cannot see what she has grown to look like. I have this feeling in my gut, that I must do this and if I don't, I won't have another chance with her."

"Sesshoumaru, my son, I, too, always thought you would make a better match for Kagome. I tried to make her see that, but being so young has its disadvantages." My father's words were true, I could feel that much. "The question that remains, is will she let you adopt them?"

"I believe she will. I believe she likes me." I said softly. "A relationship with her would have never been taken lightly, nor would I want her to allow me to adopt them without properly knowing them. I would spend most of my time with them. It's not only Kagome's opinion that matters, it's theirs too. Since they have no idea who their father is, I don't feel it's as important to tell them at all that I'm not their real father. I want them to know me and to trust me before that particular information is told to them."

"So what you are telling me is that, before you would legally adopt them you would have a meaningful relationship with Kagome. This is not just for sex, and I know with you it isn't, but I have to ask nonetheless, and you will care for those children as if they were your own flesh and blood."

"If Kagome will be with me, then yes."

I watched my father contemplate what has been said. This is not a decision to be made lightly among the inu clans. The prospect of taking over another Inu's territory is not something that is done often.

"I know you will not make me regret this decision."

And I had my answer. I was given his silent blessing that if Kagome chose it, I would be able to legally adopt Kenji and Yumi as my own. Even without Inuyasha's cooperation.

With my father's help I was led back into the living room, where it was deathly silent. I sat down next to Kagome, where her hand was automatically in mine.

I wasn't sure what had taken place in the kitchen between Sesshoumaru and InuTaisho, but I knew it was serious. As soon as Sesshoumaru was sitting next to me again, I grabbed his hand. It was a comforting gesture.

"Sesshoumaru and I have spoken about this matter personally. My decision was not made lightly and cannot be changed."

I waited on the edge of my seat, my heart beating frantically.

"Inuyasha, please believe me when I say this. Yes, those children are yours biologically, but they are not your children to raise. Someday, you will have children with your wife and they will be yours. Kenji and Yumi will not be your responsibility, nor will they know you are their father. You will never tell them. If you decide to take it upon yourself to tell them, you will be disowned."

The word disowned. Every rich kids dreaded word. A word I did not expect to come out of InuTaisho's mouth. And when it did, nothing was sweeter than watching Inuyasha's jaw drop, I was surprised he said nothing.

"Kagome, should you decide to pursue a personal relationship with Sesshoumaru it is and always will be, ultimately be your choice if you will allow him to adopt Kenji and Yumi. I have given Sesshoumaru my blessings on a potential relationship with you and the prospect of possibly adopting Kenji and Yumi. I have always seen you as a daughter, and I hope someday you will be my daughter. I truly believe, Sesshoumaru is meant to be their father, and I believe you and him are meant to be together. The choice is between the two of you. Just know, no matter the choice, I will always love you and my grandchildren."

With his final words InuTaisho stood up, motioning at Inuyasha to stand up as well.

"I believe it is time for Inuyasha and I to take our leave. Thank you for dinner, it was as wonderful as I remember."

My mother smiled and nodded, leading them to the door.

"If you don't mind, I'll ask that you allow Sesshoumaru to spend the night here with Kagome." my mother spoke to InuTaisho, surprising me

He only nodded, kissed her cheek, and pushed Inuyasha out the door. After she closed the door, she came into the living room and sat down across from us.

"Daughter of mine, I trust you to make the right decision."

She smiled and stood up. She headed for the stairs.

"I expect you in bed shortly, I know you are old enough to take care of yourselves, but it's been a long day. I'll get Kenji and Yumi into bed and see if I can find some pajamas that will fit Sesshoumaru to leave on your bed."

Sesshoumaru and I sat together for a moment before either of us spoke.

"I agree with my mom, it's been a long day. Do you mind sleeping in the same bed as me?" I wanted to know, before I assumed

"I would be rather disappointed if I could not sleep next you."

I smiled and stood up, bringing him with me. I led us up to my room where there was a pair of pajama pants and a tank top laying on my bed for Sesshoumaru. I handed him the pants and told him I'd be right back. I grabbed my pajamas and ducked into my closet to change. It didn't matter, he couldn't see me. I waited and asked him if he was done changing. When I received a yes, I went back to my room. He was sitting on the edge of my bed. I crawled onto the right side of my bed, pulling him up next to me on the left side. After having situated the blankets he pulled me close to him. His right arm wrapped around my shoulder and my head on his chest. And then spoke as I fell asleep.

"I could sleep like this forever."

* * *

Yes, I know it's been forever! I hope this makes up for the wait. Please give thanks to my wonderful beta XxSoliexHiddenxX, who checks up on me to see how I'm doing and follows along with this story too. She's a writer too, so you should look at her work too.

Please remember, reviews are like cookies. [=

Neko


	4. Dreaming and moving on

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any of the Inuyasha characters. The only characters I own are Kenji, Yumi, and Sakura.

Warning: Lemon, very detailed sex scene. If you don't like it, then don't read it. Kay.

Neko

* * *

_It was wonderful. My children were running around, laughing happily. Sesshoumaru running after them, taunting them._

_ "Daddies gonna get you!" He said laughing loudly_

_ "You can't catch me daddy, I'm gonna make it to mommy before you catch me." Kenji said barreling at me_

_I never felt him run into me, because when I looked up I was looking at a teenage version of Yumi. Her silver hair was French braided into pigtails; she was on the arm of a teenage Kenji, his long black hair pulled up into a high pony tail. They were laughing and carrying on until they noticed me._

_ "Mom? Are you okay?" Yumi asked me, staring at me_

_I just nodded and smiled. The two of them looked at each other and shrugged and continued walking. I looked away for a moment and was blinded by a white light._

_I was in the hospital I gave birth in. Kenji was pacing outside a door while Yumi was nowhere to be found._

_ "Kenji, where is your sister?"_

_ "Mom, have you gone crazy, she's in the labor ward, giving birth to your first grandchild." He said looking at me like I've gone crazy_

_ "Of course, I just spaced out for moment." I said looking at the floor. "Is the baby's father in there?"_

_ "No, he isn't, why would he be? He raped her."_

_I went to say something but a woman in scrubs came out of the door._

_ "We are pleased to welcome little Rin to the world today. Regrettably, I have some bad news. Yumi didn't make it."_

_I gasped for breath as I started crying. Kenji, he just stood there eyes widening. He collapsed, and I screamed._

I felt someone shaking me, as I opened my eyes. I looked over and it was Sesshoumaru, shaking me awake.

"Are you okay Kagome? You were fidgeting and then you started screaming. Did you have a nightmare?"

I paled, recalling the vivid dream of learning that my daughter died.

"It started out a good dream. The twins were running in the park giggling and laughing as you chased them. It was beautiful, they called you daddy. Then it switched to them as teenagers, walking down the street together. Then I was in the hospital, Kenji was pacing in front of a door. When I asked him where Yumi was, he told me she was in the maternity ward, giving birth to my first grandchild and that she was raped. The doctor finally came out of the door, telling us I had a granddaughter, but that Yumi hadn't made it through the birth. I remember gasping for breath; it was like I was drowning. I looked at Kenji, whose eyes widened and he just collapsed. That's when I started screaming." I said, holding back the tears that were threatening to escape my eyes

I knew Sesshoumaru couldn't see that I was almost crying, but I'm sure he could smell it. Finally, I couldn't stop the tearing and I started crying. He felt for me and pulled me to his chest, murmuring sweet nothings in my ear. Telling me it was just a nightmare, that my babies were okay, and that everything would be fine. After all they were Inu demons. I cuddled as close to Sesshoumaru as I possibly could after I had stopped crying. I sighed softly before looking up at his face. I still remembered his piercing amber eyes that now were a shade of silver.

"Did no one ever tell you it's not polite to stare?" Sesshoumaru spoke suddenly, making me jump in surprise

"What happened to you Sesshoumaru that you lost your sight?" I asked softly

He looked like he was in deep concentration, looking for the answer to my question. Finally he breathed in deeply and sighed. I had a feeling he didn't want to tell me. I went to say he didn't have to tell me, if he didn't want to.

"I was driving home from college one afternoon. My girlfriend at the time, Kagura, had called me. I answered, telling her I was on my way back to our apartment. I looked away from the road for a spilt second and when I looked back, a tractor trailer's cargo had come loose and was heading right for my car. I tried to swerve to avoid the very thing that was coming at me. When it hit my car it shattered my windshield, sending glass flying into my face. I had no time to block those flying shards from hitting my face. I ended up being rushed to the hospital, glass shards embedded in my eyes. Thankfully, they didn't completely ruin my eyes during the surgery to remove the pieces of glass. They told me there was a chance that when they removed the gauze from my eyes, I could be blind. I didn't believe them, I thought since I was a full Inu demon, my eyes would heal like nothing had happened. After weeks of having my eyes wrapped, it was time for the gauze to come off. Kagura and my dad were with me. When I opened my eyes, it was dark. I had thought they had the light off, to protect my eyes from the harsh light after many weeks of being in the dark. But I soon learned that was not the case. The doctors were right, I was blind. When Kagura found out that I could no longer see, she broke up with me." Sesshoumaru said, blowing out a shaky breath. I knew this wasn't a story he spoke of often.

"How long ago was the accident?" I asked putting my head on his shoulder

"Almost two years ago. It was difficult at first, to navigate around without being able to see, to have to use a walking stick. I hate walking around, hearing people whisper about me, like they thought I was some kind of cripple. I showed them though, Sesshoumaru Takashi is no cripple, being blind has opened my eyes and showed me that even though I cannot see, I see things better than most people."

I nuzzled his shoulder lovingly. Silently thanking him for telling me about his accident. No words needed to be said, it was as if we were on the same brain wave and nothing else mattered right now. He turned on to his right side, pulling me closer to him, his body pressed against mine perfectly like a puzzle piece. My head under his chin, my hands pressed to his chest, his arms holding my hips tightly, but gently. I looked up at him; he looked peaceful, at least compared to how he looked around his step mom and brother. My right hand of its own accord found its way into his hair, tugging on it softly. What was I doing? I could see him smirk softly, his left hand running up my side from my hips, resting along my cheek.

With his index finger he lifted my chin softly. I had the feeling this was his way of seeing exactly what I looked like, without really being able to see me. He held my head, bringing his face closer to mine.

"I know it's a little soon, but may I kiss you?" He asked me softly, a slight nervousness in his voice

I blushed even though he couldn't see it, before nodding. What was one kiss gonna hurt? I felt his lips on mine softly and then something unexpected happened, I felt a spark between us. His lips moved slowly against mine, experimenting, getting used to the feeling. It was electric, and I wanted more of it. I pulled him closer, or rather tried, but it seemed I was as close to him as I could get in this position. What felt like minutes was only a moment before he slowly pulled away from me.

"Please, kiss me again?" I asked quietly

He never spoke, but placed his lips on mine again. It was exhilarating. The passion behind his kiss was unlike anything I had ever felt before. It was different, and I didn't want to lose it. Suddenly, he was on top of me, kissing down my neck, all the way to my collar bone. I gasped at the sensations I was feeling. I never felt like this when Inuyasha had touched me. Sesshoumaru lightly nipped at my neck, bringing me out of my thoughts. I looked at him; he was contemplating, probably wondering if we should be doing what we were doing. I knew Sesshoumaru would not do to me what Inuyasha did, but was I ready to place my heart and body in Sesshoumaru's hands so soon? I knew I wanted him; his kisses were like a drug, addicting, sweet, and passionate. I felt his lips on mine again, his tongue pressing against my own. I moaned as his hand grazed my breast, caressing me lightly.

I was hot, and he was only making it worse. His touches were slowly driving me crazy. I pulled his shirt off, admiring his well-toned chest and abdominal muscles. I ran my hands up and down his chest, and then up and down his back, grabbing his butt. This man was toned everywhere, and he was gorgeous. I don't know when it happened, but I was laying in my underwear. His hands roaming my body lovingly and gracefully. I found the waist band of his pants, slowly trying to push them down. Finally he was on top of me in nothing but his boxers. I could feel his erection rubbing against me. He was bigger than Inuyasha, something I had almost thought impossible, but he was better, gentler, he cared about me and not his own pleasure. I felt him move, and his fingers hook around the sides of my panties, asking silently if it was okay to remove them. I couldn't speak, the words didn't want to come out right now, so I did the only thing I could think of, I lifted my hips so he could pull them off. My panties, once on me, are now laying at my feet. He strokes his hands up my shaking legs gently. To say I was nervous was an understatement, I was beyond nervous. What if I mess up? Or he doesn't like me because I'm so inexperienced?

"Kagome, relax my dear, what we do is up to you, we can stop anytime you like. I don't want you to feel as if I am pushing to have sex with you." Sesshoumaru said rubbing my cheek with his hand. "I will never do to you what Inuyasha did to you so many years ago."

I breathed in deeply and then exhaled nervously.

"I want to, but what if I mess up? I'm not really experienced." I said biting my lip

Sesshoumaru laughed softly. His laugh was sultry and suited him perfectly.

"You're inexperience and innocence only makes being with you even more pleasurable Kagome." Sesshoumaru said huskily

I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, burying my hand in his hair.

"Please don't hurt me Sesshoumaru, because I don't think I can handle it."

Sesshoumaru smiled softly and gently pressed his lips against mine once again. His arms wrapped around me, after unhooking my bra, he pulled it off, throwing it to where my discarded panties lay at the foot of my bed. He removed my hands from his hair and holds them above my head with one of his hands. With his free hand, he caresses my breast once, pinching my nipple between his thumb and index finger softly. The pleasure rippling through my body was something I had never experienced. Soon he let go of my wrists, his other hands going to my other breast, teasing my nipple the same way as he did to my other nipple. Once he felt that my nipples were hard to his liking, he began kissing down my stomach, leaving small pink marks across my abdomen.

I pulled him up to me, kissing him passionately as his clothed erection rubbed against me once again. He kissed my neck once again, this time leaving a small dime sized hickey at the junction of my shoulder and my neck. His left hand made its way down my body, rubbing small circles down my stomach. His unexpected rubbing of my womanhood sent jolts of pleasure across my whole body. I had never even touched myself there; I had never felt the effect this spot had over my entire body. I hadn't realized Sesshoumaru had moved until I felt something warm lick me.

"Sesshoumaru!" I moaned softly, afraid to wake up any members of my family.

I had never experienced this before, the sensation was completely new to me, and it was intense. The licking of that special nub there was erotic and was making me even more wet. I thought the pleasure was as intense as it was going to get, until I felt him slid one of his fingers inside me. I arched of the bed, that feeling familiar, yet unfamiliar to my body. Another finger inside, rubbing, caressing, moving in and out. And then a third finger inside me, stretching me, and preparing me for what's to come next. He stopped his licking as I reached my peak, stopping me from coming. He removed his finger, licking them, and wiping the saliva on the sheet. He brought himself face to face with me, once again placing his hand on my face, which I realized was his way of knowing exactly where my head was.

"Do you want to continue Kagome? I will stop if you do not want to go any further."

I looked at him for what seemed the millionth time tonight and I smiled. I couldn't resist giving myself to this perfect man. The one man who asked for nothing in return and only wanted to pleasure me.

"I don't want you to stop, I want you inside me. I want you, no; I need you to erase Inuyasha from my mind once and for all." I said pushing down his boxers as far as I could.

He moved on the side of me for a moment to take off his boxers. In that instant I felt lonely and cold without him on top of me. No sooner than I thought that, he was on top of me once again, this time his bare erection rubbing against my womanhood. I wasn't sure how he was going to fit, and I knew it was going to hurt, but I wanted this.

"Gome? Dear?" He said breaking me from my stupor

"Yes?" I asked looking at him. Was he having second thoughts against this?

"We may have a tiny problem that just occurred to me."

I stared at him, pondering on what he could be talking about. Then I realized what he was talking about as he rubbed himself against me.

"You don't have to worry about a condom; I've been on birth control since the week after I gave birth to the twins." I said giggling softly as his face went from serious to relaxed

"As much as the thought pleases me to see a very pregnant you carrying my child, that's not a good idea at this particular time."

"I agree." I said rubbing his cheek this time

He kissed up my neck, working his way up to my ear, nibbling softly. I felt him push inside me slowly. I tried to spread my legs as far as I could to make it easier, but he just grabbed my legs and held them where they are. He was halfway inside me as tears dropped out of my eyes. The burning feeling was an exceedingly painful reminder of my first time, but I shoved that thought from my head. He continued to push inside me until he was fully in. With tears still running my pale cheeks, I tried to bury my head in his chest.

"I'm sorry Kagome; I didn't mean to hurt you."

I knew he meant those words, and I know he took his time pushing inside me. We laid there for a few minutes, allowing me to become adjusted to his size. I wrapped my legs around his waist, experimentally twisting my hips against him. I must have done something he liked because he growled softly, moving slowing out and quickly slamming back in. The pleasure was unfathomable. The feeling of his erection inside me was better than anything I've ever felt, as I met him thrust for thrust, we were moaning and growling softly. He unwrapped my legs from his waist, spreading his legs out, placing my legs around his. I pulled him down to me kissing him hard, thrusting my hips up against his when he stopped moving. He grabbed my hips, roughly thrusting in and out before slowly and once again began caressing my breasts. I was close, the tightness in my belly was getting worse, and I felt like I was going to explode. I felt Sesshoumaru move slightly. When I looked he was sitting on his knees, pulling me by my hips closer to him. When he had me where he wanted me, he started moving once again, hard, fast, slow, deep, and finally when I couldn't take anymore, he did something that had me arching off the bed into a position I didn't know I could even do. As he continued thrusting into me, he was rubbing that nub that brought me immense pleasure. I couldn't stand it, I felt like I was going to die from the pleasure I was receiving from this silver haired god. Finally when I felt like I was really going to die, I went in to a state of numbness that was so spectacular that I all I could see was white. All I felt was Sesshoumaru still rubbing me, thrusting inside me roughly, but it was so good. I pushed myself up, wrapping my arms around his shoulders, moving myself up and down on his erection, riding out this magnificent wave of pleasure that this man just brought upon me.

He rolled over, laying on his back, my legs on either side of his waist. I continued to move myself on him, twisting my hips in different directions until I felt him sit up. He was moving me on him quickly and I knew he was close. I started kissing down his neck, nibbling on his skin softly, and then I felt my back against the sheet again. He took me hard and fast, wrapping me legs around his waist to go deeper than he was. And in an instant I felt him stop moving. I felt warmth inside me that I hadn't felt since I got pregnant, but I knew with him everything would be so much different. He stayed inside me for a while so we could return our breathing to normal.

He looked at me and right now I wish he could see me, and that I could see his gorgeous amber orbs once again. He kissed me softly before pulling out of me. I felt a sudden loss not having him inside of me and as quickly as he was out of me I wanted him back inside me. I hugged him, throwing myself on top of him.

"Thank you Sesshoumaru." I said kissing him softly

"You don't have to thank me for anything Kagome. I wasn't too rough was I?"

"No, it was perfect and so different then my previous experience. I didn't know it was possible to feel like that." I spoke the last sentence softly

"Then you enjoyed it?" He asked me kissing my forehead as I nodded

"I think we should probably get dressed. Its already one a.m., the twins will be up in a few hours."

Sesshoumaru nodded at me and sat up. I reached down to the bottom of my bed and separated our clothing and one by one handed him each article of his clothing until he was dressed. I quickly redressed myself, cuddling myself as close to Sesshoumaru as I could.

"Tonight, I'm taking you on a date Kagome. Just you, me, Kenji, and Yumi." He said holding me close

"Just like a family." I said yawning

"Our perfect family." He said as I nodded off into dreamland and this time I had no nightmares of my daughter dying, but of my future daughter being born.

* * *

End. I know Kagome and Sesshoumaru progressed pretty quickly, but I felt it was a good move for them. I hope this makes up from the horribly long wait. Please give thanks to my wonderful beta XxSoliexHiddenxX, who checks up on me to see how I'm doing and follows along with this story too. She's a writer too, so you should look at her work too.

Please remember, reviews are like cookies. [=

Neko


End file.
